just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
