Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
