I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Randomize
