I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
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