i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
