she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
