Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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