Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Randomize
