i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
