Swine flu. Run for my life!
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
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