are you still at the devil's house?
plz talk dirty to me
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
