Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
