Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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