You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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