Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
