I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I hate all girls vehemently.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
