i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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