And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Randomize
