Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
