Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Randomize