Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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