at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
