As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
