I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
