Where is the hickey?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize