Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Success! We fucked roommates!
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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