Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
