I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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