Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize