1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize