I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
