A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize