So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
