Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Randomize
