I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
