I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
God gave him joint rollers for hands
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
The power of my boobs compel you
Randomize
