think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Text me some of your sweat
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