hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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