You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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