so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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