You're so nebulous sometimes
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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