before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
