so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
