Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
wow bdsm is so cute
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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