I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
