ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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