Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
he puts the penis in happiness.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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