we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I have fence marks all over my body
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
