the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
