I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Why is your signature on my underwear?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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