whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize