I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
